Never Let Me Go
by randomle26
Summary: And the arms of the ocean are carrying me. And all this devotion was rushing out of me. In the crushes of heaven for a sinner like me. But the arms of the ocean delivered me
1. New Horizons

**AN: I know I'm really in no place to be making new stories, but this is a short story so I'll try to be much more motivated to finish.**

**For any Rob/Star lovers…I get it. But please don't hate on my story. I'm always going to be a Rob/Rae lover but I don't hate Starfire. I surprisingly like her better than other Teen Titan characters (cough cough Terra cough cough).**

**The story tittle is Never Let Me Go by Florence + The Machines**

**I hope you like it and I'm sorry for any inaccuracy or any grammar/spelling errors**

* * *

_So you're tired but you're alive_  
_ So open up your eyes_  
_ And you can get some sleep when you are dead_  
_ Kill the clock inside your head_  
_ Bring your normalcy to the edge_  
_ And watch it drown in new horizons__  
_

* * *

"_Okay **Mrs. Grayson** you're going to have to push."_

"_Oh my gods, I thought I was already!"_

"_Rachel please don't yell at the doctor. Come on you can do it!"_

"_No, no I can't."_

"_Rae come on he's almost out. You can do it. You've faced worse! Remember that time Dr. Light-"_

"_RICHARD! This is a terrible time to be mentioning a story like that!"_

"_Oh right! Come on Rae! One last push!"_

"_Aaaaaah!"_

"_Is he okay?"_

"_He's just fine. Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Grayson. This is your baby boy."_

"_We did it. I can't believe we did it."_

* * *

I am still in disbelief on how my life had changed.

One day I'm the Boy wonder, the Batman's prodigy and leader of the Teen Titans.

Now I'm just Richard Grayson. Just Richard.

I always thought I was going to be a superhero forever. I don't know maybe gain a new identity. I even considered being called 'Nightwing'? How weird would that have been?

Truthfully, I'm glad I'm no longer a superhero. I'm still devoted to my city, just in different ways.

Now I'm just Richard Grayson, newspaper journalist.

I even thought I would be a detective by day, I'd help people that way as well. But being a reporter is better. I'm spreading awareness and the citizens can learn to fend for themselves. Gotham was too dependent on Batman, and Jump City was too dependent on the Titans.

In reality, I did like writing.

But this job benefited everybody. I was doing something I truly enjoyed (with reasonable sleeping hours). And, my wife wouldn't be too worried about me.

Ah my beautiful wife- Rachel Grayson. I'm one of the few people who still calls her Raven. We had been _happily_ married for 8 years. And 3 years ago she gave me the best anniversary gift ever: a baby son.

His name is Caleb Grayson.

I love him to death. He has my blue eyes and Raven's beautiful smile.

What more could I ask for?

* * *

I pick up beautiful orchids for Raven on my way home. Today these expensively beautiful orchids were on sale. Might as well spend some money on my wife's favorite flower. At least it would be one other thing she had to look forward to.

According to Raven's earlier emails, work was slightly more hectic than yesterday.

Raven runs a small diner near a very nice community center. Book shop was already run by someone else so a diner with decent food was Plan B. The only reason she was given the land and money for the café was because she was good friends with the mayor of our little city. Raven knew I wasn't _that_ fond with serving people so she was originally content with running it herself.

Thankfully our friend, Carlisle (Carly for short- her parents had originally intended for her to be a boy and were too lazy to go through name picking again) was open towards helping Raven.

Raven picked it actually. I was content with wherever we lived. But Raven, being who she is, believed in compromise. She thought it was only fair so she picked a city where she was comfortable and where I was close to Bruce. I honestly never even knew that

Raven was happy. In fact now, we're living in a two story house on the mountain that looks over the city. (I never knew that Raven was one for the countryside.) It was originally a 'haunted house'. But like I told Raven, I've been to Hell, bring it on.

* * *

It's a long drive with many twists and turns, but it's completely worth it. I didn't really care, as long as Raven was happy.

"Honey I'm home!" I say to the open air of my living room.

"Daaaaaddddyyyy!" I quickly place the orchids on the table and pick up my son.

"Hey there, Cal. How was your day?"

Caleb giggles, "I really really like the diner. Carly even let me write the specials on the chalkboard."

Feigning amazement I ruffled my son's hair, "She did? Wow. What'd mommy do?"

I placed my son back on to the floor, "I don't know. Mommy was in her office. She was talking to some man."

This was when my jealous senses were on alert.

A distant melodic voice calls, "Caleb! I thought you were gonna clean up your coloring books when your dad got home."

Caleb starts running toward the voice, "I'm coming Mommy!"

Raven comes out of the back door wearing a red apron and holding an empty bowl. I'm very thankful Cyborg took the time to teach her how to cook _well_.

She put the bowl in the sink and began rinsing.

This was one of the times I hated how stubborn Raven was. This was a typical routine: she expects me to come to her instead of vice versa.

Deciding to obey today, I walk up and wrap my arms around her petite waist.

I place a chaste kiss on my wife's cheek, "What's this I hear about you spending all day in your office talking to _some guy_?"

Raven shakes her head and smiles. It was nice to see her show some emotion nowadays. She turns around and wraps her arms around my neck as I wrap my own arms around her waist.

"The mayor came in and needed a favor." Oh what a relief.

"What did he want? Is it good or bad?" I might just be paranoid but Raven looked at the floor before answering me, "Ask me again another time."

I opened my mouth to say something before I was interrupted by a hungry growling. We turned around to see Caleb rubbing his stomach and lickling his lips, "Mommy, can I have those muffins? You promised!"

Raven chuckled. She untangled herself from my embrace and picked Caleb up, "If you finish eating those vegetables I'll let you have one."

"But I don't like broccoli! It's gross, and green. Mommy you know I don't like green. I like blue!"

I stand behind Raven smiling at Caleb. Of course his favorite color was going to be the one that Raven and I favored.

Raven got down and asked, "But don't you want to be strong?"

Caleb thought it over, "You mean if I don't eat broccoli I won't be able to fight crime? Like daddy and Uncle Bruce?" Raven nods.

"Okay. I must go finish the broccoli. I wanna be just like Daddy."

"I hope he doesn't want to be exactly like daddy." Raven hugs me reassuringly knowing _exactly_ what I'm referring to.

I would never leave Caleb or Raven.

Not if I don't have to.

* * *

I see Raven already in bed by the time I'm done showering.

She has her lamp on as she's reading her new book. She doesn't notice me enter.

Same old Raven.

I rapidly make my way towards our bed. I get under the covers and stare at my wife. I want to get her attention but she's already lost in her novel.

There's only one way to distract her.

I sit up and began placing chaste kisses on her ear and neck.

"Richard what do you want?" She knows me so well.

I take the book from her hand, "I want to talk about your meeting with the mayor."

She lays on her side so she's facing me, "What about it?"

"You never answered my question," I say cautiously. Over the years, I've picked up on Raven's trigger words, "Was the meeting good news or bad news?"

"Really depends on which side you're asking?"

Why are there sides? "Rae, now you're just tip-toeing." For comfort, I lay on my side so I'm facing her.

She runs her hand over my chest, "_Dick_ if it was something bad I would've told you." She only calls me Dick or Robin when she's being serious.

I pull her as close as possible. We're so close her nose is touching my t-shirt.

"Raven…"

"Richard don't worry about it. Just worry about the next big promotion."

I sigh and caress her arm, "Rae there's a reason I'm no longer a superhero. I'm done taking jobs that I put before my family."

She sighs, "I know, Richard."

* * *

We're sleeping peacefully when thunder strikes.

I have my arm protectively over her waist. Her face is nuzzled into my chest.

"Daddy?"

I immediately sit up to see my son rubbing his eyes at my doorway. He's dragging the stuffed bear that I won for Raven- who gladly passed it on to our 3 year old son.

Raven feels me waking up and rubs her eyes. She wakes up to see Caleb at our door, "Caleb, sweetie, what's wrong?"

Caleb shakes his head, "I wanna sleep here tonight. Beany and I are scared." Caleb begins to affectionately hug the stuffed animal. Without hesitation, I get up and pick my 3 year old up and his toy. I place him in the middle of the bed so he's separating me and Raven.

Raven drapes her arm over him and he cuddles closer to his mother. I ruffle his hair, "What is it, Cal?"

"I had a bad dream, Daddy. Beany couldn't help."

Raven soothingly kisses Caleb's head, "What was it about?"

Caleb's blue eyes began to fill with tears. Raven races to wipe his tears before anymore can fall. He looks at Raven with a confused expression and cuddles closer to her, "Why was everyone crying?!"

Raven and I share a confused expression.

"Crying?" I ask worriedly, "Cal, who's crying?."

He shakes his head, "I don't know! Everybody was all sad. Mommy was sleeping and everyone was crying."

Raven, being the empath trying to sort out her son's emotions, calmly asked, "What did you see, Cal?"

"There were flowers. They were pretty flowers. Mommy's favorites. And then there were people. I think Uncle Roy was there. Everybody wore black. Even I was. And so was Daddy. But Daddy was crying. I don't know why. Beany wouldn't tell me."

"Why was Daddy crying?" Raven asked worry reaching her eyes very quickly.

"I don't know! Mommy was in a box wearing a dress. It was a pretty dress. It was blue. But everyone was sad! Why would they all be sad if mommy was _sleeping_?"

Thunder _and_ lightening strikes again.

Why was my son having dreams about a funeral?

* * *

**I know some of it seems OOC but it's fanfiction….that's kinda expected.**

**1st Chapter Song: New Horizons by Flyleaf**

**Hope you enjoyed!**

**Read and Review!**


	2. Your Guardian Angel

**AN: Just updating another chapter because I love writing. And I have nothing better to do.**

**As always, i'm sorry about any inaccuracy, grammar mistakes, or spelling mistakes**

**Song: Your Guardian Angel by THE RED JUMPSUIT APPARATUS**

* * *

_I will never let you fall  
I'll stand up with you forever  
I'll be there for you through it all  
Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

* * *

"He dreamed about Rachel's funeral?"

Maybe it wasn't the best idea telling Aiden, a coworker and good friend of mine, about Caleb's bad dream.

I sip my steaming hot coffee, "Should I be worried?"

"I don't know, man." Aiden says sitting on my desk. "It was probably just the thunder and the lightening. Or maybe it was Rachel's cupcakes, those things are, for some reason, only good in the day."

I couldn't help but chuckle, "They were muffins. And they were actually good this time."

Aiden punches my shoulder lightly, "Dude, you shouldn't be worrying. It's not like he was telling the future or something."

If only he knew.

"I don't know. I think I should be a little worried." I ran my hands threw my hair in frustration.

"Dude you've had nightmares before. Hell, everyone has. Did any of them ever actually come true?"

"Not mine," I say calmly. Aiden raises his eyes, "So has Rachel ever had bad dreams that came true?"

* * *

_Raven was non-stop crying into my shoulder, "Oh Richard! It was horrible. I-I can't…I just-"_

"_Ssh ssh Raven. Honey there's nothing to worry about," I say calmly as I stroke her hair. She slowly begins to stop crying as I soothingly rub her back._

_She grabs on to my t-shirt as if she was drowning and I was the only thing for her to grab. "I-I just…I have to protect him. No one can hurt my baby!"_

_I tighten my embrace, "Raven. You're father is not going to hurt us. He's not going to come back for you or Caleb. It was just a bad dream. C'mon baby, don't cry."_

_I feel her shaking her head underneath my chin, "But- But what if it's an omen? What-What if he really does come back? I could n-never forgive myself if you o-or Caleb g-got hurt!"_

_I stroke her hair and kiss the top of her head, "I'm going to protect our family. No one's going to hurt you or Caleb."_

"_I don't know, Richard. Maybe I-I should just go. It-It would be better…"_

_I grab her face so she was forced to look at my face. My eyes bore into hers, "Raven don't! Don't ever think about leaving."_

"_Oh Richard! It's my fault. I can't…I just-"_

"_None of this is your fault. Sweetie you're overreacting, it was just a stupid dream. Nothing's happened. Leaving your family is never the answer." I say rubbing circles over her cheeks, "I don't know what I'd do if you left. Rae. I love you."_

_I place small kisses all over her face. She kisses my cheek, "I love you more."_

_I bury my face in her luscious hair, "Not possible."_

* * *

"GRAYSON!"

I woke from my memory to see Aiden and our boss, Chandler, staring at me.

Chandler was a pain in my ass.

"Yes, sir?"

Chandler scoffs at me, "I don't pay you to stare at the ceiling. Did you finish that article?"

Thankfully Aiden covers for me, "Dick's almost done, sir. Just a couple of grammar errors then it will be ready to publish."

Chandler smiles in approval. He always favored Aiden over me. Not that I really care, he could worship the ground I walked on and I still wouldn't respect him.

Chandler points his fingers at me, "Get it done! Don't you want people to know that the latest serial killer in Gotham was just caught?"

"Yes sir. It would be almost as if I caught him myself." Oh the irony.

"Can't believe that son of a bitch was caught by a guy in tights!" I can't help but chuckle. He obviously would not like Bruce.

"Grayson stop daydreaming and start writing. If you stop daydreaming about prancing around like that freak in tights you might actually get some work done."

What I would do for a birdarang right now.

* * *

Going into the diner, I saw how packed it was. Then again, I never really knew Raven to exaggerate something.

Carly waves me over to an empty bar stool, "Hey there Richie! What'cha doing here?" She's playing with one of her red pigtails and chewing on the eraser of a number two pencil.

I chuckle and lean my head on my hand, "Just looking for the Mrs."

Carly pushes her brown glasses up to the bridge of her nose and smiles. "No problemo, chico. Rae-Rae the hubby's lookin' for ya!"

One thing I liked about Carly: she didn't care what she was doing and who was watching her.

Raven walks out from behind the kitchen towards where I'm sitting. I chastely kiss her, "I love the dress." It's just a plain purple dress that I gave her on our 3rd anniversary. I still wear the watch that she bought me.

She smiles, "Well seeing as you bought it I would assume that you would like it."

I brush her nose with mine, "Well it's different from all those corset dresses you used to wear when we were younger." She pulls away and pushes me lightly, "I swear to god if you bought me a dress like this _with_ pink polka dots I'm going to start calling you 'Starfire'." I chuckle in response, "Well baby steps. Purple's a nice color anyways."

She hands me a cup of Coke, "Sweetie, I'm beyond sure that you didn't come here to talk fashion."

"Where's Caleb?" I ask drinking my soda. She begins drying wet glasses, "He's at home with Cindy." Our nanny was a student-teacher at the night school in our neighborhood when she wasn't looking after our son.

Raven stops focusing on me and on drying the glasses, "Yes she called 10 minutes ago. They went to the park before I left in case you're interested."

Knowing me so well, Raven places a plate of steak and mashed potatoes in front of me.

It takes five minutes before breaking the silence, "Do we need to talk last night?"

I'm very grateful Raven doesn't start making a joke, "I…I really don't know what to do Richard."

"It's not some demonic trait right." I don't know why I said that. If I'm lucky she wouldn't have heard me with my mouth full.

Luck is not on my side right now.

If we were in private Raven would probably be doing more than glaring right now. She might have thrown a chair at my head with her powers.

"_Dick_, I already checked. None of _me_ was passed over." She slams the clean glass on the counter and reaches over to grab another dirty glass.

I take her hand and squeeze it in mine, "Rae, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. It's just…"

"I know I'm sorry. I'm just a little on edge." She puts down the rag, "I just…don't want my son having dreams…like I do."

I squeeze her hand tighter, "Raven, it was just a dream. It probably doesn't mean anything. Aiden doesn't think so easier."

"Aiden knows _nothing _about dreams or omens or magic, Richard. He's not _empathic_."

I sigh, "I know, baby. I just agree with him and you don't need to be overreacting."

"It's not overreacting Richard. I'm worried."

"I would be scared if you weren't," I kiss the back of her hand, "Raven he's our child. He's going to have nightmares every now and then."

She sighs, "It's just…you know…me and.." I kiss her hand one more time, "Raven it's _not_ you. It's normal. Do you know how many times I've had dreams like that?"

"Richard…I've never heard you talk like that."

I smile, "I know how you worry. Besides it's no big deal because I know you. It's nothing we need to be worried about."

* * *

I only go home early when I'm really stressed.

I couldn't handle the rest of the day: worrying about Caleb or Raven and getting yelled at by Chandler.

I walk in to see Cindy and Caleb playing with Legos.

"Daddy look, Beany and I made a castle!" I can't help but smile at how adorable my son is with that old bear.

Cindy laughs, "Beany did a lot of work this time." She gets up, "Do you mind if I leave, Mr. Grayson? A friend asked me to substitute-"

I put my hands up to calm her down, "Don't worry Cindy. It's fine." She smiles and grabs her coat, "Did your wife tell you about my raise?"

I began taking off my coat and placing it on the couch, "I would be suspicious if she didn't. Don't worry. If it helps with grad school we have no problem with it."

"Thanks, you guys! Bye Caleb" She waves before leaving.

I sit down next to Caleb and smile, "Cal what'd you do today?"

Caleb jumps into my lap, "We went to the park. Then I was coloring and painting. And we started playing with Legos."

Caleb gets off to grab a very interestingly colored photo. It's a very nice photo of a family and a bear standing in front of a house on a hill.

He points to the stick figures, "That's us, Daddy." He reaches for another picture.

It's a very sweet picture of a girl and a smaller sized boy.

"Do you think Mommy will like it?" It takes me a while to realize it's a drawing of Raven and Caleb.

I kiss the top of his head, "I think Mommy will love it."

His blue eyes gaze down and he stares happily at the picture.

I sigh and rub his arm, "Caleb. Do you understand that dream you had about Mommy?"

Caleb looks up at me, his bright, blue eyes filling with tears, "Y-yes. Cindy told me that everyone was crying b-because Mommy went away."

Sometimes Cindy was a little too honest.

I sigh and place a small kiss on his head, "Caleb you're Mommy is not going anywhere anytime soon. We love you and would never leave you."

He clutches my shirt in his tiny fist, "Good! I don't want Mommy or Daddy to leave."

* * *

It's been a few days since the whole freaky-nightmare incident happened. Everything was going fine. This is why I was very curious as to why my wife was waking me up in the middle of the night.

"Dick you need to wake up." Raven whispers as I groggily open my eyes. "Oh Azar, Dick get up!"

"Dammit Raven, what are you doing? It's so early!" Why the hell was she wearing her old uniform underneath her coat?

Raven sighs and throws me a shirt and pants, "Richard we need to go."

"Raven if this is some weird trip that I don't know about then I'm going to be very upset!"

"Dick. This is serious! The mayor is evacuating everyone." I began putting on the shirt.

What the hell was she talking about?

When I asked, I watched as Raven froze and stopped panicking.

"Raven…_what_ did the Mayor tell you that other day?"

"Richard we don't have time-"

I grab her wrist tightly, "Raven for the love of god please stop and answer me!"

I pull her back to the bed with me and she sighs, "That day…the mayor asked me to help him with this town evacuation."

"I would appreciate it if you would go into more detail."

She hands me socks and shoes, "Richard. The mayor told me that a group of, for lack of a better word, Mongols, has been slowly coming towards the town. We don't have enough protection for everyone if they stayed put. So the mayor wanted to evacuate everyone so everyone would be safe if they decided to attack."

What…the…freaking…hell?

"And you're just telling me now?!"

I get up and begin grabbing our emergency kit that we had already packed (for natural disaster situations).

"Raven what the hell was that big favor he wanted?"

"Richard…you'll find out soon enough." Please Raven, worry me more.

"Raven the mayor knows we are and…"

She screams back, "_Robin_ he doesn't want _two _former members of the Teen Titans to help right now!"

Why the hell not?!

"Richard I need you to be supportive. Please just go get Caleb." I grab her wrist, "Raven, how worried do I need to be?"

She sighs and calmly holds my face, "Richard please just get Cal. I'll…please don't worry right now."

I don't want to worry her. A worried Raven enhances her (controlled) emotions and makes it harder for both of us.

I obediently go down and wake Caleb up, "Cal we need to leave."

Cal cutely rubs his eyes, "Daddy. Why are we leaving?"

I give him his clothes, "We just need to go. Your Mommy needs us to leave now."

"Can I bring Beany?"

"Of course you can, son."

Once he's finished putting on his shoes he looks up at me and asks, "What's going on, Daddy?"

I…I don't know.

* * *

We reached the town border to see everyone loading their luggage into big busses.

I happily helped my neighbors. I couldn't find Raven anywhere. All I saw was Cindy hugging her parents and helping them with their luggage.

And Aiden walking towards me asking, "Can you believe this? They're gonna take us into Gotham for a little bit. I have an apartment up there, you got somewhere to stay?"

I smirk inside and think immediately about Bruce, "I think I'll be fine."

Aiden notices me looking over at Raven and Caleb saying goodbye to Carly.

"Richard what's wrong?" I sigh, "I just…Raven woke me up today and it freaked me out. She's being…fidgety. It's not like her to be so…shaken up."

Aiden shakes his head putting his hand on my shoulder, "Richie Richie Richie. Tsk tsk tsk. You have got to chill. Raven's probably worried about the house and the diner and your family. Can you blame her? Town evacuation's are pretty scary."

I run my hands through my hair. _We've been through worse and she's never like this._

* * *

Aiden leaves to go say goodbye to his girlfriend leaving me time with myself.

I can't figure it out. What is going on with Raven?

Everyone begins boarding the bus.

I lead Caleb to go first. Raven follows behind slowly after her conversation with the mayor.

Raven makes her way towards us. I gesture for her to go first. But she stands there and shakes her head.

I get closer and wipe her tears- wait, tears?

"Baby what's wrong?"

She sighs, "This…this is the favor the mayor asked me."

I'm beyond confused, "Raven what are you talking about?"

She holds my face in her hands, "This is the favor the mayor asked me. He…wants me to help with the evacuation. Give you guys more time."

Caleb runs up to us, "Mommy, Daddy what's wrong? Aren't we going?"

I shake my head. "Raven come on we need to go."

"Richard you don't get it! I'm not going." I hold her face, "Raven…"

"_Robin_, me and some others are going to stay back and defend the town. Just to distract them and give you guys some time to go. It's the only way."

"No, Raven it's not! We're a family and we need to stick together."

Caleb grabs on to my shirt, "Daddy what's going on?"

Raven lets me go and walks over to our son. She crouches down to his eye level.

"Caleb, I want you to know that Mommy loves you. Mommy loves you so very much. And no matter what you do, Mommy is always going to love you and is always going to be very proud of you.

This was the first time seeing my son hug his mother broke my heart. Raven lets him go and walks over to me.

"Richard I love you. This is just something I have to do."

"Rae. Please. Did I do something? Did I-"

"Richard it's nothing you did! It's just…I have to protect my family first. You taught me that."

_Was that her way of blaming this on me?_

"Raven please! Don't go. You can't leave me. You can't leave Caleb." I didn't know what else to do. What other ways could I use to show her that we need her? That I need her?

"Richard please understand. I have to protect Caleb and you. With my help, you'll make it in to Gotham faster. You'll be safer."

"But I'll be without my wife. I'll be without you. Raven you can't do this. Please go on the bus with us."

She shakes her head and pulls me into a passionate kiss. I can taste the pain in her tears. The sacrifice was clearly present. I tightened my arms around her hoping that I'm just dreaming and that she won't let go to _defend us_.

"Raven," I murmur against her soft lips, "Please don't go. Don't leave us."

She shakes her head and tries to pull away. I wrap my arms around her tightly trying to bring her (if possible) closer to me. I lay my head on her chest listening to her heartbeat. I'm not ready to let go yet.

She brings my head up and kisses me softly one _last_ time. I'm now only holding on to her hand.

"Mommy!" Caleb runs towards his mother and grabs a hold of her leg. "Mommy, don't go! Don't leave us! You promised!"

_Yes Raven, you promised._

She picks Caleb up and holds him tightly. "Caleb I have to protect you and your Daddy. I love you so much sweetie." She points to his heart, "I'll always be with you, okay?"

Before he can respond, Raven puts him down. She kisses my cheek. Before I can grab hold of her again she begins to run towards the town along with some police officers and some of our neighbors.

She stops and looks back.

I see her mouthing, "I love you" to me before running off again.

Caleb tries to go after her but I grab him and wrap my arms around him.

My son, crying into my shoulder, asks, "Daddy why did Mommy leave? I don't want her to go. You said she wouldn't leave, Daddy!"

I sigh and look him in his bright eyes. I now notice how much like Raven he looks.

"She's leaving…to protect you. She wants you to be safe and alive. So we're gonna help Mommy…and board that bus."

_Please don't take her away from me._

* * *

"Master Grayson. We got Miss Raven's call and set up a bedroom for you," Alfred greets us with a smile.

I do my best to smile in response, "Thanks Al." He looks behind me, "Is Miss Raven with you?"

That was a bullet to my heart. "No, just me and Caleb. Would you mind helping with the bags?"

I first left promising Aiden and Carly that I'd call once I arrived safely at Wayne Manor. On the trip over, I called some old friends to let them know what was going on.

Victor and Karen were worrying the most (Raven was Victor's "little sister" and Karen treated Raven like her best friend).

Garfield did his best to cheer me up with some cheesy knock knock jokes.

Kori was worried and began baking some odd Tameranian pudding that she would try and bring over.

Roy was the most helpful and told me that since he was already in Gotham and he would stop by.

When Raven and I began dating, I wasn't fond of her relationship with Roy and how close he was to her. They called each other best friends but everyone thought it was more. Raven told me herself that Roy was like the brother she always wanted (while Garfield was the younger brother she never truly wanted and all her other half-brothers were half-demon and pains in the ass). I would sometimes get jealous of their relationship, but Raven always reassured me that there was nothing going on between them

I trusted Raven with everything I had. It was still hard to adjust to the fact that Raven wasn't by my side. Every few hours Raven would call to tell us that she's fine. I couldn't believe her. I was so afraid that she would get herself hurt.

_Because I love her. I want her by my side not defending our family. _

"Daddy?" Caleb asked tugging on my arm, "Where's Uncle Bruce?"

"Right here," a husky, familiar voice called out. I broke my thoughts to see my _father_ coming towards us.

Caleb lets go of my hand and runs to the billionaire philanthropist.

Right now, I couldn't even smile at the joyous sight.

"Caleb why don't you go upstairs to your room while I talk with your dad? There are some toys waiting for you." Like Wally would, Caleb runs as fast as he can to his room upstairs.

* * *

"You okay, Dick?" Bruce asks in his office as he hands me a cup of coffee.

I sigh, "I…I don't know." He smiles at me, "She's going to be fine. This is Raven we're talking about. She can take care of herself."

I shake my head, "Yes I know but…but what if she gets killed or something?"

Bruce raises his eyebrow at me, "Why are you being pessimistic, Richard? This isn't like you."

Without thinking I blurt out the dream that Caleb had. I even decide to talk about how scared I am that the love of my life might die trying to protect her friends and family.

Bruce understood, "Dick, people have nightmares about deaths all the time. Trust me. You don't need to worry."

Why do people keep telling me that?

"Besides," Bruce continues, "Raven's strong. That's one of the things I like about her."

I put my coffee down and sit, "It shouldn't be Raven. It _should_ be me protecting our family. It's my responsibility."

"It's both of your responsibilities. You both need to protect your family. Richard don't you remember why you gave up being a hero? Why you both stopped? You both had a family that you needed to put first."

I shake my head and bury my face in my hands, "I love her, Bruce. I'm not ready to lose her yet. I've already lost my parents… I would die if I lost another person that meant the world to me."

Bruce sighs and sits in front of me. He moves my hands so were eye to eye, "Even if you lose her, you don't really lose her. She'll always be in your heart. And you have friends and a family that loves you. That's what people need to be happy. It would kill Raven if you weren't happy."

"How can I be happy without her? I should be out there helping her. How can I help her?"

"By having hope." I scoff. Bruce sighs, "Richard you've done it before. If you could hope that you wouldn't lose Raven to Trigon's wrath, you can hope that she'll come back to you and your child."

* * *

I'm waiting in my bedroom for Raven's call.

Caleb was downstairs playing with Beany and Bruce and I didn't want to bother him.

I guess Caleb can sense when I'm feeling lonely…just like his mother I might add.

Caleb sits besides me and holds my hand, "Mommy's gonna be okay. She always is!"

I smile at his enthusiasm. I kiss his head, "That's right Cal. Mommy grows stronger every time you put out good thoughts like that."

Caleb is smiling at the thought of making his mother strong. He doesn't need to tell me for me to figure it out.

The phone rings.

I squeeze his hand and grab it. "Raven?"

"Richard?" She's panting out of breath, "Are you guys safe?"

"Yes," I say smiling at Caleb, "We're safe at Wayne Manor. Are you okay?"

She doesn't respond immediately.

I hear a bang, "Raven what's going on?"

"Mongols enjoy throwing bombs at their enemies."

I'm slowly beginning to panic, "Raven when are you coming home?"

I can practically see her suppressing a sob, "Richard…I-I don't think I'm going to be coming home."

"No Raven, don't say things like that. Have hope. Just like before, remember?"

"Richard this is different. We're losing. There are only 4 of us left."

I have to focus on Raven. "How bad your damage?" I ask not sure if I really want to know.

"Just some cuts and bruises," I know for a fact that she's not telling me the whole truth. "Richard, can I talk to Caleb?"

I hand it over to Caleb. He's smiling and it breaks my heart, "Hi Mommy!"

I can't hear what she's saying but his smile is falling, "No! No, Mommy! You promised. You said you weren't gonna leave! Mommy I miss you. Come home! Come home now!" I see the tears being shed and I can't wipe them away because I know more will come.

She speaks one final time to Caleb before he drops the phone and runs out of the room. I would normally chase after him but instead I grab the phone.

"Raven, please listen to your 3 year old son and come home. Baby we miss you. Please come home so you are safe with your family."

She sobs, "I'm so sorry Richard."

"Why do you have to be sorry, Rae? You did your job. Come home. Please Raven!"

She's about to speak but instead I hear a scream. "Raven what's going on?!"

She's groaning, "I'm in an old house. And the second floor just collapsed."

Tears are flooding my eyes more than before, "Raven-"

"Richard I love you. Richard I've always loved _you_. You've made me so happy. You helped raised our son and you gave me a life. I know that you're going to raise Caleb well. And you'll find someone to help you and she's going to be perfect for you."

"Raven I don't want anyone else! I just want you. Please come home now!" My tears are being released.

"Richard I love you so much. I love-"

BANG!

"Raven… Raven! Raven answer me!"

The line goes dead.

I throw the phone at the wall and sit on the bed. I put my face in my hands and cry. I've never cried this hard in a long time. Even when my parents died, I didn't cry this hard.

I hear footsteps. "Robin I'm sorry I got here as soon as I could!"

It's just Roy standing in my doorway. He notices me crying and sits next to me.

"Dick what happened?"

_She's gone._

* * *

**Please Read and Review. I hope you enjoyed it, it was a long one!**


	3. Lucy

**AN: Here's the final chapter…**

**Song: Lucy by SKILLET**

* * *

_They said it'd bring some closure to say your name  
I know I'd do it all different if I had the chance  
But all I got are these roses to give  
And they can't help me make amends_

* * *

"_Richard, what are you doing? I thought you were going to help me unpack your old stuff."_

"_Do we have to do it now? There are so many other things we could be doing right now, Rae-Rae."_

"_One, what did I tell you about calling me Rae-Rae? And two, you're the one that couldn't decide which of your old stuff you wanted to hang in our living room."_

"_Don't you love the sound of that? 'Our living room' has a nice ring to it."_

"_We could either talk about how cute it is that we've been living in the same home for two years, or you can hand me a pair of scissors."_

"_Sweetie, I think you need to relax."_

"_Dammit, Dick! I think one of the movers already opened the boxes. Thankfully it's just a small box."_

"_Well sweetie, what's in it?"_

"…_It's a diamond ring."_

"_Do you like it?"_

"_Yes it's…beautiful."_

"_Why don't you try it on?"_

"_It fits just fine. Maybe I should-"_

"_Why don't you keep it on? It looks better on you then it does in a dusty old box."_

"_Really? You know if I wear it kind of symbolizes-"_

"_-that we're engaged, and that we're going to be together…forever. And I don't see a problem with being engaged to you."_

"…_Did you plan this while I was bringing in the rest of the boxes?"_

"_Maybe. Did you not like it? I can try again. We live on a hill and everything so it shouldn't be that hard to figure out a romantic-"_

"_It was unexpected, and probably the best surprise I've ever had. You know, compared to the others." _

"_Well that's good. So bottom line is, you accept?"_

"_Well the ring is beautiful, and you're nice. So I do accept."_

* * *

"Why won't you stop thinking about me?"

I turn over on my side to see Raven. _Stop it, Dick! She's…not here anymore._

Raven was lying right next to me. She was wearing a black dress and her long hair wasn't in a ponytail. The way she was dressed reminded me of the night of our engagement party. She looked so beautiful, not that she didn't look beautiful any other time.

"I can't help it," I told imaginary Raven, "I-I miss you…so much."

She smiles lightly and places her hand over mine, "Everything's going to be okay."

A tear falls as I shake my head, "You're not here anymore. Nothing's okay."

"Richard, don't think like that."

"I can't help it! I just…lost you. It should've been me. I should be the one protecting our family, making sacrifices. It shouldn't have been you!"

"Richard, are you okay?" Roy cautiously opens my door.

I rub my eyes. Quickly, I looked over to the other side and Raven has disappeared. Just like in reality.

"Nah Roy…I'm, I'm fine. You can come in."

Roy chuckles, "You wearing clothes?" How did _he_ and Raven become best friends, again?

I roll my eyes, "Sweetheart, I don't like you like that."

He opens the door, "Damn, I was so looking forward to it though." He walks in and leans on my bed, "Why were you screaming at yourself?"

I cough, "It's just…nothing. Bad dream."

"You were dreaming about _her_, too?"

I stare at him actually looking at him. His hair is a mess and there were obvious black circles around his eyes. He notices me staring and smiles, "Yes it's very odd for a guy to be losing sleep over the death of his best friend. I would assume that it's even worst for her husband."

I put my face in my hand before looking back up at Roy, "No, _Speedy_, I've been getting great sleep. I can't help but think about how awesome it's going to be tomorrow when I take my son and go fix up my house and pick up my dead wife! I'm fine!"

"'I'm fine' is probably the most common lie ever used."

Roy sits next to me and puts his hand over my shoulder, "Richard it's going to be okay."

I shake my head, "I can't believe that _this_ even happened. Just a couple days ago we were having lunch together at the diner. Now…now I have to go pick up my wife's body from the morgue."

"Robin…it's okay to miss her. But you need to focus on getting your son back into his home, safely."

* * *

We came back to a mess.

The central hub of the town was in ashes. But the mayor was already ahead of everyone, working on rebuilding.

My home was fine. It was so far away and so high no one bothered to destroy it.

They one. Raven, the others, they won. Despite the fact that they all died they won. The Mongols left and weren't planning on coming back.

It was nice to know that my wife losing her life and her family was worth something.

Although her efforts would've always been worthy to me and Caleb.

It didn't matter, though.

Raven was gone. She wasn't coming back.

I had no wife. Caleb had no mom.

* * *

"Daddy do you _have_ to go to work today?" Caleb asks me looking up with his big blue eyes. It's killing me that I have to leave my son…especially now.

I pick him up in my arms and hug him, "Sorry, Cal. Don't worry, I'll be back before you know it."

Caleb nuzzles his tiny head in my neck, "When can we go see Mommy?"

"How about at lunch?" Caleb wasn't physically smiling, but his eyes were filled with joy, "I miss Mommy."

I put him down and crouched down to his level, "I miss her, too."

* * *

"I heard the news, I'm sorry Grayson," was the first thing Aiden said to me that morning.

"I'd prefer if we didn't talk about it." Aiden shakes his head and pushes the laptop screen so I'm looking at him, "Richard, it's not your fault."

Chandler happens to walk over, "Grayson, stop lollygagging and get to work."

Not having enough energy to come up with some sarcastic remark, I respond calmly with, "I'm sorry, sir. I'll get back to work."

Chandler walks over to my desk, "I heard what happened, Grayson. Sorry about the Mrs. She was the one with the purple hair right? Anyway she looked-"

Aiden interjected, "Chandler I don't think you should be-"

"No Aiden really. Let the boss finish."

"As I was saying," Chandler continues with a smirk I would happily wipe off without hesitation, "Grayson there are plenty of other fish in the sea. Prettier fish. I saw your wife, she was okay. She's not like my usual girls. She needs a bigger-"

Next, I knew for sure that I definitely lost my job. I just threw a punch at my boss and he flew into the desk across mine.

I was prepared to keep going further if Aiden hadn't grabbed my arm.

"Richard, don't."

Chandler gripped his nose, "What's your freaking problem, Grayson?!" He didn't say the word "freaking", I would actually prefer to block out the word he used.

I push Aiden off and grab Chandler by his collar, "Don't you dare talk about my wife like that. She sacrificed her life for her family, her friends, and her community. Dead or alive she is still a much better person then _you_."

I threw him back on to the floor, "And if it wasn't clear, I quit."

* * *

"Wow, Richie, I didn't know you had it in you. You actually hit your boss," Carly exclaimed when handing me my steak.

I sipped my beer, "Yep. And I actually liked that job." I shake my head in regret, "I don't know why I did that. I just lost a job that paid good bills and kept a roof over my family's head."

Carly sighed, "I don't blame you, chico. That SOB crossed a line. He shouldn't have said that crap about Rae-Rae. And besides, this diner _belongs_ to her. I may be overstepping my ground when I say the diner also belongs to you."

"I don't know anything about running a diner." She smiles, "What the hell do you think I do for a living?"

I can't help but laugh, "Thanks, Carly."

"No problem, sweetheart. Just get me a nice diamond ring."

My smile falls slightly, "Carly you know I-" She laughs at me, "Jesus Richie, you'd think you could take a joke. Besides I gotta date tonight. She's very lovely." I raise my eyebrow, "I thought Marcus was…" Laughing at me apparently was something she enjoyed doing, "Obviously you don't have many bisexual friends. Don't worry Richie. I know only Raven holds your heart."

"Daddy I'm scared." I look at my son who tightens his grip on my hand, "What are you afraid of?"

"I…I don't know if I want to see Mommy." I squeeze his hand, "Don't you miss her?"

He nods in response. I now understand why he doesn't want to see Raven.

_That's acknowledging that she's actually gone._

I pick him up into my arms, "I think Mommy wants to see you. And if…you really don't want to see Mommy, Cindy's outside."

"Okay Mr. Grayson, are you ready to see your wife?" asks the town's Mortician.

_I don't know if I am_.

* * *

There she is lying peacefully. Her face is mostly covered in cuts. Her cloak was covered in patches of blood. Her leotard had a big spot of blood around her stomach area. There were a few bruises on her hands. Her legs are covered in bruises and cuts that would've scarred (had she still been alive). There are even black charred spots on her legs (probably coming from when the roof collapsed).

The mortician pointed to the blood spot on her leotard, "Our Medical Examiner found shards of glass in her stomach." _That makes me feel so much better. _"I'll let you have some time before you sign the papers."

Once he leaves, Caleb runs over to Raven and grabs her hand. He squeezes it, "Daddy, can I say something to Mommy?" I smile in approval.

"Mommy. How are you? I miss you. I love you. Beany misses you, too. We both want you to come home. I'll even eat my vegetables. And I'll help you make better cupcakes. I do like your cupcakes. I just want to help you. I like helping you, Mommy. So you need to come home so we can make cupcakes together."

Caleb runs up to me, "Do you think Mommy will wake up now?"

I sigh and kiss his head, "I don't think so, Cal. But I bet she would have loved to make cupcakes with you." Caleb runs off towards the Cindy.

I walk closer and grab Raven's hand. Out of instinct, I brush her bloody hair from her eyes.

"Hey Raven. I…I really don't know what to say to you right now. Other than, I love you. Honey, I love you so much. You don't even know. And I regret not telling you that every second of the day. Also I knew that if I had done that you probably would have hit me…with a chair. I know how insecure and secretive you can be sometimes but that doesn't change the fact that I love you. I find it cute whenever you blush because I tell you you're pretty or how you smile every time I mention an old memory. God the Titans miss you. Hell I think you're the reason Roy hasn't been able to sleep at night."

It's taking me a while to notice how, even in death, Raven makes me tongue-tied.

"Roy misses you, but you know how optimistic he is. He doesn't want to succumb to the negative. Kori would've force-fed me her Tameranian pudding if I hadn't gotten out of Gotham soon enough. Garfield's like Roy, telling jokes to make everything better. Victor and Karen, damn it took me a while to tell them. They're definitely more heartbroken then anyone. You know everyone loves you, baby."

I was done talking about everyone else. It's my turn.

"Raven I don't know what to do, now that you're gone. I-I wish you were here. I don't know if I'll be able to manage without you, baby. I…I wish you would have told me and let me help. We were a team, partners. I…No one agrees with me but I know this much is true: it should have been me. Dammit, I'm supposed to be the one protecting the family. You shouldn't have made that sacrifice. You should have…"

_No. I can't be mad at her_

"I love you. I miss you. I miss the little things you do: kissing me in the morning, putting a side time to make me a special plate at the diner even if you don't know if I'm going to visit, god it doesn't matter because I love everything about you. I am proud to be called your husband, and I'm so honored to call you my wife. I never told you, but I love the fact that I had that bond with you. I always thought it would be more special for you if it was with Roy or Victor, hell even Gar. But you chose me. You opened up to me. I never regretted anything about us. I never wanted to change anything about us. I would even go back to hell just to find you again. If I could do it over again, I would in a heartbeat without hesitation."

* * *

It was difficult deciding how to…honor her. Raven and I never talked about how she wants to go or how I want to go. The mayor offered to have her buried with all the other…martyrs.

I didn't want that. I didn't want Raven to be buried just like any other citizen.

If I had it my way, there would be a shrine or something.

We decided a simple ceremony in the backyard.

Everyone important to Raven was there.

The ceremony was simple.

Garfield planted a wooden block with Raven's name on it (symbolically representing a gravestone). Karen planted Raven's favorite flower around the piece of wood. Victor placed pictures of Raven (from her Titan days, her wedding day, and of her family). Kori performed a Tameranian tradition to worship the dead. Roy placed Raven's favorite possessions around her grave. Caleb put up all the drawings of Raven that he made.

I…I spoke.

"Raven. I love you. We all love you. We hope that you are happy and well wherever you are. We know now that you're in a better place. May you rest in peace."

After the ceremony, Caleb ran up to me.

"Daddy, do you think Mommy misses us?

I smile down at him, "Cal, I know for a fact that she misses you. But no matter what, she'll always be with you. In your heart. And somewhere else watching over you. But I want you to know that I'm going to be there for you as well."

Caleb smiles and wipes his unshed tears, "I miss her. I want her back."

_Me too, son. Me too._

* * *

**That was the end. I loved writing about this. **

**I do plan on making a (for lack of a better word) sequel one shot. I think it's going to be 12 years later in Caleb's POV. **

**I know the whole funeral speech was terrible but I put a lot of effort into the confessions so i had nothing left in me. **

**I hope you enjoyed. **

**Reviews are appreciated. **


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